I feel as though I am mourning the loss of who I once was. It is the most intense bittersweet loneliness.
Mourning the loss of someone who is now at peace, out of misery, no longer suffering. But the death is still so fresh that it aches nonetheless.
There is a rooted understanding that this death is making way for new growth –
like a forest burned to the ground
I am hopeful, even though I am smoldering.